Houses, Grasshoppers, And The Importance Of Feeling Useful

Sure, it's been a couple of days since the weekend, but I promised that I'd post about it. Besides, I would have posted this yesterday, but my computer was fubar'd for reasons unknown.

My in-laws are building a new house on a acreage a few kilometers out from my hometown of Whitecourt. Unbeknowsnt to me but knownst to my wife, we had promised to spend our long weekend helping them with some of the construction. I was a bit disappointed, but considering my father-in-law has helped us with a ton of our projects, it really was the least we could do.

When we get out to the acreage, the first thing we notice are the grasshoppers. They're everywhere. Millions of the little fuckers are hopping all over the site. Some of them are even committing suicide by jumping right into the windshield as we drove up. Luckily, my dog Bear knew just what to do.

As for the actual work, it wasn't too bad. The only real problem was that there were too many chiefs and not enough indians, if you know what I mean. I spent the majority of my weekend standing around because my father-in-law was too busy to tell me what he needed done. Kinda funny, huh? And every time I tried to help him with whatever he was doing, he'd say "Don't worry, I've got it".

Boy, did I feel important! How useful was I?

• About as useful as a condom at a lesbian convention.
• About as useful as a vote for the Green Party.
• About as useful as the National Gun Registry (Way to put a dent in violent crime! I sure don't see any of that anymore! That's $2 Billion well spent! Thank you, Exceedingly Expensive National Gun Registry, for making the streets safe again! )

Well, at least Bear was still having a good time.