Demon Video Game...

I apologize for the lack of new posts this last little bit. Work has been piling up and I can't just drop everything to blog, considering it pays better.

"Well", you say, "Why don't you blog in the evening?"

Simple. That's Mr Humble Guy's time. And right now, Mr Humble Guy's time is being spent getting my ass handed to me by Soul Calibur 3.

What's that? You want your ass back? Okay, fine. Here you go, Crybaby.

Now, I consider myself a fairly competent gamer. Definately not the best, but I know my way around most video games. As long as it's not a strategy-type game, I can usually do pretty well. Considering Soul Calibur 3 is a fighting game, I figured I would be alright.

No other game has had me screaming at it in frustration as it repeatedly owned me. It's not that it just beat me. It also cheaped me out almost every single match. It could have decided to beat me just normally, but it thought it would be funnier if it juggled me around in the air, perform over-the-top moves that I can't seem to avoid, and generally not allow me to fight back.

Well, it certainly got me riled up. I started to make a few belligerent comments towards the game out of sheer frustration. A certain few that I can remember are worth repeating.

1. "...come on....come ON....COME ON...NOOOO!!!! FUCK YOU!!!! FUCK YOU!!! FUCK YOU!!!! FUCK YOU!!! YOU GOD-DAMN CHEAP FUCKING GAME!!!"
   
2. "NOOOO!!! I PUSHED THE FUCKING BUTTON TO ATTACK, NOT THE BUTTON TO FAG OUT AND GET THE FUCKING SHIT KICKED OUT OF ME!!! FOR FUCK'S SAKES, THIS FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT VIDEO GAME HAS A GOD-DAMN RODNEY KING BUTTON, AND I'M THE FUCKING ONE WHO FOUND IT!!!"
   
3. "UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE!!!! I'M GOING TO FIND OUT WHOEVER FUCKING PROGRAMMED THIS FUCKING GAME AND EAT HIS FUCKING CHILDREN!!! FUCKING SON OF A FUCK!!!"
   
4. "...heh...that's just fucking great. Alright, here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to take you out of the console and TAKE A FUCKING SHIT RIGHT ON YOU! THAT'D MAKE BLOCKBUSTER'S FUCKING DAY, YOU FUCKING STUPID GAME!!!"

As you can imagine, I'm no longer allowed to play when Mrs Humble's parents are visiting.